Top Reasons The Chiefs Will Win Christmas Eve

 

 

 

You guys really have it made. Week after week you log on to one of the greatest Chiefs fan sites (I’m biased) and get to read the magical writings of quite possibly the most awesome Chiefs fan writer to walk the planet. (I’m biased, remember?) Every week I spend my Friday night putting together nonsensical words to make sure that you wake up Saturday morning with a smile. Sure this tireless effort gives me countless adoring fans who would do practically anything I would ask of them. Jump up and down? Check. Run in a circle? Check. I could go on and on. So what else do I get from writing these articles? How about the gift of foresight? For starters I have begun to notice that my predictions are always spot on. I predicted the victory against the Chargers last week. I predicted the beatdown of the Raiders. I predicted that Kareem Hunt would have a breakout rookie season. I could use this power for personal gain. Lotto numbers anyone? Instead of abusing my power I am going to help us all. I will share my special gift with the masses. I will give you the top reasons the Chiefs will win on Christmas Eve.

 

Reason number one: The Dolphins suck.

Reason number two: Jay Cutler has already thrown 14 interceptions this year and should be good for 2 or 3 more this week. Call it his Christmas present to us.

Reason number three: Marcus Peters figured out how to tackle. I know I know. It was only one game but Snickerdoodles if I wasn’t surprised that he actually tackled someone. He rang a bell, and confetti rained down from the heavens and somewhere an angel received their wings.

Reason number four: Kareem Hunt appears to have an offensive line that doesn’t give me horrible nightmares featuring Barry “The Matador” Richardson. Ole’!

Reason number five: Arrowhead gives the ultimate home field advantage featuring over seventy five thousand screaming fans. It’s also “… the land of the free and the home of the CHIEFS!!!!”

Reason number six: Derrick Johnson is back as the leader of the defense. Now I know he has lost a step since his achilles injury but he still will bring the hammer down on his opponent. You may want to ask Marshawn Lynch how he felt after DJ stuffed him into the dirt.

Reason number seven: Just picture in your mind an Indian Chief and a Dolphin locked in a mortal struggle to the death. I’ve ran this exact scenario through my mind numerous times and not once have I pictured the dolphin triumphing over a fully decked native warrior chief. Most of the time the outcome is the chief and his war party are enjoying some delicious dolphin roasted over an open fire (Editor’s Note: he means tuna). The other two times involve not so dolphin safe tuna (in no way does ArrowheadOne advocate the delicious, succulent crime of cannibalism). Editor’s Note: he was not forced to say that.

Reason number eight: My dog says they are going to win. He’s a good boy. Such a good boy.

Reason number nine: Matt Nagy took Andy Reid’s Chinese takeout menu away from him thus revealing a hidden play sheet underneath littered with passes beyond 5 yards, slant routes, and nary a bubble screen in sight. With Andy finally giving up the play-calling duties we have seen a few missteps but overall the outcome has been fantastic. Now I am a bit downtrodden with the lack of jet sweeps but even I can’t fault the results. Who knew Tyreek Hill would become a legitimate number one receiver. Speaking of Tyreek Hill….

Reason number ten: Tyreek Hill. Whether returning a kick or running a fade route Tyreek Hill has shown the league that last year was not a fluke and he is capable of taking over the duties of a team’s top receiver. He tops the league with blazing speed, terrific hands and has some of the longest touchdown catches. No matter where he is one the field he is a legitimate threat to score.

Reason number eleven: Travis Kelce is the best tight end in the league. I know Patriots fans will be screaming into their clam chowder with this claim, but Kelce is the best tight end in the league. He is a pass catching threat, a selfless blocker and a clutch player. One thing that he has going for him that Gronk doesn’t, he isn’t made of glass.

Reason number twelve: My dog really is a good boy.

Reason number thirteen: The Dolphins are 6 and 8 and on the outside looking in when it comes to the playoff race. They will never wrestle the division away from the Patriots and are the 10th seed in the playoff race meaning they are almost all but eliminated from contention. Not only would they have to win out but they would also need a miracle to have the Raiders, the Chargers, the Ravens, the Bills and the Titans lose their remaining games to get in as a wildcard. They have nothing to play for and will be shifting to rebuild mode in the offseason.

Reason number fourteen: I am the Nostradamus of Chiefs fan sites. My will be done.

 

There we have it guys. The bonafide reasons the Chiefs will win on Sunday. Call it an early Christmas present from me to you. Now for my final prediction. Chiefs win 34-to-12 and will also win the turnover differential with +4. Kareem Hunt will have 150 yards rushing with two touchdowns and Travis Kelce and Albert Wilson will have a touchdown each. Harrison Butker will be perfect on the day with extra points and two field goals.

 

Comment below and let me know how awesome I am. It helps me through the day. As always VIVA LA JET SWEEP and GO CHIEFS!

 

 

 

 

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  • PaulFromNorthMo

    Man, you’re awesome!!

    • Heilios

      I’ve put that line at the end of my articles for a few months now and you are the first person to say it! Laddie should give you a prize or something. Maybe season tickets on the 50 yard line??? What ya think Laddie?

      • ladner morse

        How about I do that for everyone who calls you AWESOME… because, you are awesome!

        • berttheclock

          Hey Laddie, saw your comment regarding Vin Scully and Jerry Doggett. Funny thing is when I arrived in LA, I was strictly an American League fan by virtue of the KC Blues being the top farm team of the Yankees and the A’s coming in from Philly. I left for LA before the A’s moved to Oakland. But, after arriving in LA, I worked for a company which had great seats at Dodgers’ Stadium. Loved to see games from there. Plus, listening to Vin Scully provided me with a visual view of the games even though I was in my car. He was such a word smith and had a great lore of baseball to blend into telling anyone what was happening on field Doggett was very good, also. But, one summer, Scully was ill and they had to hire a local TV sports broadcaster. He was from Oklahoma and had very little knowledge about baseball. So, all he could do was recite stats over and over and over and over. Nothing worse than having to listen to just stats.

          • ladner morse

            It still amazes me that some are stuck-on-stats… while the real trick is relaying what you see… painting a reality, or fantasy, as the case may have it.

            I know I’ll never be able to even touch the hem of Scully’s garment… but I have often wondered why, when I write, that some of the words come to me, as they do… and I think about my own influences… and Scully is one of them. Of course, and I know I’ve said this before, that Jim Murray of the L.A. Times was my real hero, writing wise. His ability to take you into his world — which many times included going golfing with stars of the day (in other words, actual encounters with the players themselves) — was uncanny. Furthermore, he was THE REASON, why I rushed to pick up the Times, every morning my parents got one, and rip the Sports section from the paper, before my siblings could get to it.

          • berttheclock

            Yes, indeed. Plus, what I have found about many people who just rely on stats is they tend to get so hung up on them that that they fail to go beyond the numbers to attempt to analyse the whys and why nots.

          • Greatness comes to a few. He was one. I grew up with Dad and a brother being Cardinal fans, so I would listen to the games at night(Oh, Harry), and fall asleep to the game quite often. Later, on Saturdays, we would find reason to work in the farm yard where we could plug in a radio and listen to the Tigers(So, Devine… he, he).

          • verbalizing and doing it well along with adding in how this or that player had this or that and it showed in the play just made.

        • PaulFromNorthMo

          Nope, just me. Because I was first, so I’m special! lol

          • ladner morse

            Yes… and I haven’t forgotten that still owe you an AO t-shirt. 🙂

          • PaulFromNorthMo

            WOW!!! I had forgotten.

      • PaulFromNorthMo

        Haha, that works for me!

    • ladner morse

      Double Awesome!

  • berttheclock

    Game plan to beat the Dolphins on the road is to force them to make Cutler throw a great amount of passes and stop their running attack. Plus, you must ground pound the ball against them.

    The Fins have won two road games this year. In beating the Chargers in LA, Cutler only threw 33 passes and Ajayi ran for 122 yards. They held the Chargers to only 44 yards rushing. They defeated Atlanta on the road by Cutler only throwing 33 passes and Ajayi running for 130 yards while holding Atlanta to only 100 yards. At home, they beat the Pats by Drake running for 114 yards, Cutler throwing for 38 and holding the running attack of the Pats to only 25 yards. But, last week, on the road, they only ran Drake 16 carries for 78 yards and 1 TD and Cutler tried to throw the ball 49 times. Meanwhile, Buffalo ran the ball for 116 yards.

    So, ground pound the ball tomorrow at Arrowhead as there will be a 13 MPH wind swirling and stop the running of Drake, who replaced the departed Ajayi at RB. You want to stop their running attack while revving up your own running attack and force Cutler to try to beat you with his arm.

    However, as to that so-called light display above, may I suggest Target still has LED lights on sale. Geez, I believe I could actually see some dark spots. But, do take care as there was a Canadian who put on a massive light display at his house, only to have to try to fix something and his life ended quickly in a Zap moment.

    • berttheclock

      Actually, the Canadian man who died fell from a ladder.

  • berttheclock

    Speaking of light displays, a few years back in Vegas, there was a fellow who owned a typical desert single story house with a white rock roof. He worked for a neon company and he was able to have them fashion two neon features of Elvis playing a guitar. Those Elvis neons were placed on the roof facing each other. While lighted, the owner kept playing “It’s a blue blue Christmas without you”. I dubbed them the “Dueling Elvies” The street outside had more traffic than many so-called Candy Cane Lanes in other cities.

  • tm1946

    #15 – Kpass will be starting for Houston…. second draft pick to make his mark this year.

    • freshmeat62

      Is this a fact? I know Houston has missed practice w/ a bug of some sort, probably flu as it is rampant in the schools now. My daughter is a teacher and said more than half the students in her school were absent 1 day. But flu usually only lasts a day or 2 and it’s over. Hopefully Houston is better by tomorrow.

      • berttheclock

        Watch carefully what you say about the flu or Laddie might cue up “rockin’ pneumonia and the
        boogie woogie flu”.

        Funny thing is a few years back, I had to go to the VA ER with some type of upper chest malady. The ER medics kept asking me when was the last time I had had various conditions. They began with the flu and seemed to go down a list. Finally, one asked me when was the last time I had a pneumonia shot. When, I said at least 10 years back, he said, “Voila, we’ll give you a booster shot”. Somehow that worked and all became well again. Geez, imagine all of those years spent in medical school to be able to just run down a long list of questions?

        • berttheclock

          But, by far the worst situation was a few years back when Pat went to a local hospital’s ER with chest pains. The doctor immediately diagnosed pneumonia and began a shot. This was indeed correct and it worked. However, near the end of the session, his supervisor came in to check on Pat. I was standing in the area and heard him ask her about smoking. She replied that she had, but, was trying to quit. All he said was “Great, because smoking can be harmful to you”. About at month later, she received a bill from the hospital and she noticed there was a $450 dollar charge on it for nicotine counseling. When, she tried to fight paying it, the hospital refused and demanded payment.

          • ladner morse

            As a teacher for many years (old story, I know)… I never got a flu shot because my system had built up an natural immunity over the years… until… two years ago when I had to get my first flu shot ever after ending up in the hospital.

            Used to cue up “Rockin’ Pneumonia and the Boogie-woogie Flu” … now I just tune in and watch, “One FLU-Over the Cuckoo’s Nest.”

      • berttheclock

        Kelce missed one day of practice with the flu bug, as well.

      • I got out of dodge, in Houston for Holidays, immediately came down with the flu and a cold. Go figure that one.

        • ladner morse

          David, glad you decided to go be with family! Gett well soon!

          • it was the mile high. Denver has always left me with a bitter taste in my mouth(Chiefs v Broncos). So I had a 2 hour layover before connecting on the to Hobby. Even when I lived near Nederland(above Boulder on Peak to Peak), whenever I got to Denver, something happened, invariably. So I will blame the flu on someone there!@@!!!!

  • freshmeat62

    About Peters and tackling. He did make 1 1st dn saving tackle at a very important time of the game. But everyone is trying to give him credit for that forced fumble that I don’t think he had much to do w/. OK he did have his hands on the runner, and at first look it seems that he pulled the ball out. But when you see from a different camera, in reality the LB, I think Ragland, had his arm in there and that is what caused the fumble. It looked like Peters was about to go into his ‘ole’ move. But since Peters did touch the runner, he may in some infinitesimal way helped w/ the fumble. Kind of reaching for straws there, but…

    I think we’re all trying so hard to come up w/ something positive to say about the guy. After watching his interview yesterday about the flag throwing incident, he seemed genuinely apologetic. He just needs EB29 there to keep him focused.

    • PaulFromNorthMo

      I’ll have to disagree with you on the fumble. After reading your comment, I went back and watched the replay and was able to play it back in slowmo. Peters had his hand on the nose of the ball and it was coming out as Ragland made the hit. I can’t say for sure the fumble would have happened without Ragland, but from what I could see, Ragland wrapped up the RB around the waist and never actually touched the ball.

  • berttheclock

    Veach is still kicking the tires, so to speak, although this may be the beginning of even more tryouts for possible reserve/future deals post season. Yesterday, they worked out the punter, Taylor Symmark, who punted for both Southern Arkansas and Texas Tech. He signed with the Vikings as a walkon last year, but, was cut at the end of training camp. Brandon Shippen, the former Temple wide out had tried to make both the rosters of the Dolphins and Rams last year. Plus, for OL, they worked out Steylan Evans from North Alabama. He was a D-2 All American who played ROG. I believe he is six four and weighs 300 pounds.

  • berttheclock

    Possible reason Sixteen would be Pat has said she will be going to watch the Chiefs tomorrow, whether, we try to slice through possible icy conditions to attend Dee’s Bar in Portland or stay closer to home in Hazel Dell and watch the game from a local bowling alley. She wants to see Alex Smith play in possibly his last regular season game at Arrowhead while wearing the Red and Gold, plus, she has become a huge fan of both Kareem Hunt and KPass.

  • berttheclock

    Hey Laddie, you’ll appreciate this. Just saw a thread at Huff Po about students at a school in Michigan pooling their money to buy a custodian of the school new work boots. They wrote about how much they appreciated what he did at the school and they had noticed his work boots to be old. There is a photo of him unwrapping the package in a hallway of the school.

  • ladner morse
    • PaulFromNorthMo

      WOW!! Congratulations Laddie!

      • tm1946

        You were the 1,000,000 post (supposedly)… I am saving myself to be #2,000,000, maybe by next week.

        • PaulFromNorthMo

          Ha, if that’s true then I was a first and a 1,000,000th on the same day. I better buy a lottery ticket tomorrow.

    • Delaware Chief

      Glad to be one of the visitors, it is a great site,so thank you Laddie. Thanks to all of the writers and the commenters who don’t tear each other apart if they disagree. I hope everyone has a Merry Christmas and how about those Chiefs!

  • drwillez37

    Arrowhead1 is #1!!!