2017 Draft: The Name Game

Every draft has its fair share of interesting and unusual names or names that are notable for some other reason. For instance, Chidobe Awuzie comes to mind. Not sure about the background of that name but I’d sure be interested in hearing NFL announcers handle that one on a regular basis. Of course, Jake Butt is one of my favorite names in this draft butt… I’ll bet that he was tired of being “butt” of butt jokes before he ever started school. I’m sure he was a very ass-tute student. Actually, I’m hoping the Chiefs draft him. He can probably be had later than he would have been drafted had he not been hurt (an MCL plus an ACL in December).

In the spirit of all-time seriousness, let’s begin with the names that may be most difficult to say.

Hard to Pronounce Names

• Tanoh Kpassagnon
• Stevie Tuikolovatu
• Cole Hikutini
• Amba Etta-Tawo

If He married Him, and took his last name…

• Davis Webb and Corey Davis

• Amara Darboh and Alvin Kamara
• Teez Tabor and Bryan Cox (oops, wrong section, shoud have been in “Great Corn Names”)
• Shock Linwood and Rushel Shell — then he’d fill out applications: “Shell, Shock”
• Taco Charlton and Jack Tocho (& they could name their kid Taquito)
• Collin Buchanan and Aviante Collins
• Mike Williams and Hayden Hunt (you would have to have seen the movie, “Porky’s”)
• Any name and… Jake Butt… how about ArDarius Stewart
• Quincy Adeboyejo and James Quick
• Tanner Vallejo and Marquez White
• Ben Braden and Tanzel Smart … yeah, but what are you now?
• Justin Vogel and Kendrick Bourne (Jason’s twin)

A song, that inspired a generation

• Levon Myers

“Levon” by Elton John

It’s Gotta Be Tough For Him

• Jahad Thomas

Names That “Feed the People”

• Taco Charlton
• Jabrill Peppers
• Reuben Foster
• Dalvin Cook
• Corn Elder
• Josh Carraway
• Toby Baker
• DeShone Kizer
• Pita Taumoepenu

“Holier Than Thou” Names

• Budda Baker
• Christian McCaffrey
• Christian Tago
• Devine Redding
• Noah Brown
• Noble Nwachukwu
• Jermaine Grace
• Emmanuel Holder
• Shalom Luani
• Khalfani Muhammad
• Matthew Godin

A song, that inspired an earlier generation

• John Law

“I Fought the Law” by Bobby Fuller Four

Players Who Are Really Spies…

… oops, do I need to get out of the country now?

• Conrad Ukropina
• Bug Howard
• Speedy Noil
• William Likely… if not, he’s a likely suspect.

Hyphen-Nation

• Ricky Seals-Jones
• Jaylen Reeves-Maybin
• Amba Etta-Tawo
• Josh Harvey-Clemons
• JuJu Smith-Schuster

Places to Go, People to See

• Sojourn Shelton
• Bart Houston
• Tony Bridges
• Dakota Ball
• Prescott Line
• Myles Garrett

Great Baseball Names

– first and last names are both first names

• Cameron Tom
• Chris Carson
• Chuck Clark
• Brian Allen
• Cole Luke
• Howard Wilson
• Speedy Noil… I know, but it’s still a great baseball name.

Possible Godfather IV Character Names to Consider… if there Ever Is a Godfather IV

• Nick DeLuca
• Joey Ivie
• Vince Biegel (Vinny?)
• Speedy Noil
• Danny Isidora
• Corey Levin
• JoJo Mathis
• Chunky Clements
• Marlon Humphrey

Should Have Played Basketball

• Trey Hendrickson
• Speedy Noil

Great Corn Names (you know what I mean… should have been a “P”)

• Demetrious Cox
• Storm Norton
• Speedy Noil
• Malik Hooker
• Jeremy Sprinkle
• Nate Peterman

Pray to God their middle names don’t begin with “K”

• Kevin King
• Kyle Kalis

Initial Impressions Are Everything

• C.J. Beathard
• D.J. Jones
• T.J. Watt
• T.J. Logan
• J.J. Dielman
• A.J. Wolf
• KD Cannon

Parents Were Working For Apple When They Were Born?

• I’Tavius Mathers
• Ifeadi Odenigbo

TNT-ish Movie Classic Names

• Sean Harlow
• Duke Riley
• Sam Rogers
• Will Holden
• Julie’nDavenport
• Fabian Moreau

Guys I’m Pulling For, Simply Because I Like Their Names

• Damien Mama
• Rigoberto Sanchez
• Bobo Wilson
• Shock Linwood
• Damien Mama
• Dare Ogunbowale
• John Law
• Rushel Shell
• William Likely
• Ahkello Witherspoon
• Damien Mama
• Ejuan Price
• Chase Roullier
• Kareem Are
• Dan Skipper
• Speedy Noil
• Cooper Kupp
• Damien Mama (I know. I know. I just like saying his name)

Greatest Football Names Ever

1. Weston Steelhammer
2. Tarrell Basham
3. Speedy Noil

Here’s a picture of “Hammer” time.

Oh, and if you’re wondering whether or not prospect Justin Senior is a senior… yes, he is a senior.

The Name Game video

A special Name Game MVP Award goes to Speedy Noil for appearing on the most number of lists in this post. BTW, Noil had a combine best 11-foot-1 inch standing broad jump and he also had the highest vertical jump of 43.5 inches which is the best since Chris Conley. No 40 time is available and he is not even on some ranking boards so no need to get your hopes up. He just has a great name.