Fatherly Advice For Young Chiefs
Some of you may have noticed my absence from the game threads on Sunday against the Saints. This was not because I didn’t want to be with all of you, but rather, it was because I was at the zoo with my family, my wife’s parents and grandparents. The Wichita zoo is a pretty nice one, and the boys (Stewart age 3, Wally age 16mo) really enjoyed it. I had a fairly good time as well, though I kept bugging my wife for the score of the game periodically, since she has a smart phone and I do not. Sometimes, to be a good dad, you have to do the unthinkable and miss the thrill ride that is live Chiefs’ football. All this rambling to say that I got to thinking about the most dad-thing of all: advice. So here I am to dish out some advice to some up-and-coming young whippersnappers (who are probably only a few years younger than me).
Charcandrick West
I’m proud of you son. I always taught you to do the right thing no matter what, even if it would get you in trouble. You did exactly that on Sunday. When the Saints took a cheap shot on your QB and the refs didn’t bother to show up for work, you made sure that guy knew that such shennanigans would not fly with you. I don’t care about the penalty. You did exactly what I want you to do, now give your papa a hug.
Daniel Sorenson
My little UDFA is all grown up. A while back I told people to get used to you being around. I was right about that. I also, however, said that you lacked the genetic traits to ever be elite. I’m starting to think I was wrong about that. You might not be the fastest guy, or the biggest guy (heck neither is your dad), but you try harder than anyone else on that field and it shows up. I know your teammates call you Dirty Dan. I like that, because it describes what you do perfectly. When everyone else is kicking back in their lawn chairs sipping Arnold Palmer’s and Leinenkugel’s Summer Shandy, you’re busting your butt getting the job done. Go get ‘em kid.
Tyreek Hill
I think you know how disappointed your mother and I have been with you. Kid you made some really bad decisions and paid the price. You did the right thing though. You owned your mistakes, and you’ve taken steps to ensure that you don’t ever become that person again. Coach believes in you and he’s given you a chance to be something special. That move has certainly paid dividends for old Andy. That catch you made on Sunday was like summertime campers: IN-TENTS (obligatory dad joke). One of the hardest things to do is to be phenomenal and humble, but keep trying to be both, because it’s those two things that got you past who you were to who you are now. You have a chance to become even more than that, stay the course and carry on my (formerly) wayward son.
Ramik Wilson
That was a great game buddy. I know you’ve been sitting on the bench all year quietly whistling “put me in coach I’m ready to play”. I know I’m your dad and I have to be proud of you, but hey, I’m not the only one who thought you did a good job. PFF liked you so much they made you the second highest ranked Chief on defense against the Saints. Life is full of uncertainty. Just because you’re starting now, doesn’t mean that you will be all year. Keep working hard and roll with the punches. You might go back to the bench again some time. Just be ready to come off it the same way you did last Sunday. Glad the coach finally gave you a shot little man. Keep up the good work.
Chris Conely
Soon they’ll be calling you Crisp Conely cause your routes are so cut. Maybe Ice Cream Cone-ly because you leave the defense cold with a brain freeze. Maybe Chris Kringle because you’re hands are a gift to any QB who has the privilege of throwing you. Getting a little ahead of things I guess, but kid, you’ve got big things ahead of you. Here’s a helpful hint, you know how teacher’s pets bring apples to school for the teach? Throw Andy Reid a surprise cheeseburger now and then. Treat Alex to a nice steak once in a while, or put him in one of your film projects. Never hurts to grease the palms a little bit and there’s nothing better at making palms greasy than a great burger.
DJ White
Kid you chose one of toughest jobs in one of the toughest careers. Criticism for you needs to be water off a ducks back if you know what I mean. You’re gonna have some really rough days (like you did against the Steelers) and some good days. This week you did pretty solid. You allowed some catches, but that’s to be expected against one of the NFL’s best passing offenses. Just keep your nose to the grindstone. Incidentally, that saying must have been a lot better when people actually ground grain that way. For me it always just conjures up an image of putting your face into a bench grinder, which isn’t particularly productive (or pleasant). Oh yea, we hope your hand heals up quickly, you’ll be needed.
Advise
What advice would you give to some of the Chiefs’ players? What advice would you give to a young dad? What’s the best thing to bribe you with? Food? Craft Beer? Fine Whiskey? Good Candy? Some precious silence from a friend who makes too many dad jokes? Let me know in the comment section.
