Twas The Night Before Training Camp

‘Twas the night before Training Camp, when all through the school

Not a creature was stirring, not even a molecule.

The jerseys were hung in the lockers with care,

In hopes that Mahomes soon would be there.

The players were nestled all snug in their beds,

While visions of Super Bowls danced in their heads.

And Sutton in his ‘kerchief, and Nagy in his cap,

Had just settled their brains for a long season of snaps.

When out on the field there arose such a clatter,

Nagy sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.

Away to the window he flew like a flash,

Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.

The moon on the stripes of the field below

Gave the lustre of game day to objects below.

When, what to his wondering eyes should turn out,

But a golf cart, and some speedy wideouts.

With a big red driver, so full of glee,

I knew in a moment it must be Andy.

More rapid than eagles his coursers they came,

And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name!

“Now, Alex! now, Marcus! now, Tyreek and Kelce!

On, Berry! On, Ford! on, Ware and Conley!

To the top of the division! to the top of the league!

Now takeaway! takeaway! It will be a blitzkrieg!”

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As footballs that before the gametime fly,

When they need a first down, go to the sky.

So up to the press box the coaches they flew,

With the playbook full of jet sweeps, and Andy too.

And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the sounds of the cleats

It was the prancing and pawing of our athletes.

As I drew in my head, and was turning around,

Down the field Andy came with a bound.

He was dressed all in red, from bottom to top,

And his clothes were all dirty with sweat and pork chops.

A bunch of new plays he had in his book,

And he was so happy his hands shook.

His eyes-how they twinkled! his dimples how merry!

His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry!

His droll little mouth was drawn up like a boss,

And his mustache was glistening with sauce.

The arm of a headset he had by his jaw,

And the play he called in, a quarterback draw.

He had a broad face and a big round belly,

That shook when he dabbed, like a bowlful of jelly!

He was chubby and plump, a right jolly play caller,

And Toub laughed when he saw him, then sent in a baller!

A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,

Soon gave me to know Andy ordered cornbread.

He spoke not a word, but went straight to the grill,

And filled all the plates, with incredible skill.

And laying his finger aside of his nose,

And giving a nod, up to the locker room he goes!

He sprang to his cart, to his team gave a whistle,

And away they all ran like shot from a pistol.

But I heard him exclaim, ‘ere he drove out of sight,

“Welcome to Training Camp, and to all a good-night!”

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